What your Star Sign Says About Your Drinking Habits (Part Two)
Part Two of a Three Part Series
The jury’s out; horoscopes are in vogue again.
There’s been a recent resurgence of appreciation for the centuries-old study of celestial bodies, particularly among millennials. Folks from all walks of life have subscribed to the revered school of astrology, putting faith in a Babylonian system of divination which promises to peer beyond a veil of mysticism that modern science is incapable of explaining
Some of us are unconvinced by the idea that an alignment of stars can predict behavioural patterns or determine personal fortunes, but others have found that their star sign reading resonates with them more deeply than they can explain. In any case, it stands to reason that even sceptics might gleam some form of insight from a quick glimpse into the annals of ancient astromancy. If you’re looking for some understanding into your drinking habits, perhaps an astrological perspective might help. At the very least – it’ll be a bit of fun.
Look, it’s our resident superstar! Born leaders like your Taurus friends, you tend to win any room over through sheer charisma so you’re never lacking in invitations to go out for a drink. But you’re a little more dignified than the rest of us. Dive bars and shots aren’t your cup of tea, although the Long Island Iced variety might just be.
Instead, you like pairing your steaks with a pinot noir or a Malbec and you know all about the fanciest bars in town. You’re classy, and everyone knows and loves you for it, but don’t forget to come back down to earth every once in a while to share a round of cold beers with the rest of us.
Virgos are the kind of friend you’d want planning your bachelorette party. They’d have scoured through all the listed bars, read all the reviews, considered all the variables and analysed the pros and cons of each establishment before finally picking a place. You can’t just spontaneously go drinking with a Virgo, because their highly analytical minds tend to be coupled with a need for perfection, resulting in them instantly identifying all the shortcomings of the bar you just walked into. But once you let a Virgo do a bit of google-fu, they’ll find the most awesome pub in town in no time.
You’re my designated driver, Capricorn. Not because you’re not a drinker, but because you’re so responsible and reliable, always looking out for your friends and curbing our wilder instincts. You’re always courteous and polite, which would make you a huge hit with that cute guy or girl if you ever bothered approaching them. More than anyone else, you understand that sometimes there’s no better feeling in the world than popping open a cold can of beer at home while watching videos at home.
They’re the guys you want backing you if you get into a fight, although they’ll probably try to break it up first as they’re smart enough to recognize discretion as the better part of valour. As dependable as they are determined, Scorpios will drink you under the table without showing the slightest sign of insobriety.
If you’re a Scorpio, try to be less competitive when you’re downing liquor and switch up your drinking habits a bit. I know you’re a tough guy or gal and you don’t get drunk easily, but that much whiskey can’t be good for the liver a few decades down the road.
Stay tuned for the last article in this three-part series for more on star signs and drinking habits! Meanwhile, check out part 1 on Boozez.Com!